Thursday, August 4, 2011

something borrowed


" pada saya kawan sampai akhir hayat dan cinta sehidup semati tak pernah ada .
semuanya adalah pinjaman semata-mata" Zhana Zulkifli

mintak maaf .sorry .vabandust .desole .desculpe .triste sebab tidak memberi respon yang diharapkan

i wanna ask a million ,if i could but i know i don't even have guts to do so .all i know is meratapi atas pemergian satu perasaan yang mana pada suatu masa dulu ,ia adalah suatu perasaan yang manis .you could say that you take a thousand ways to fix it back to normal ,but you know i double those to get rid of you .every night i end up thinking about all the time we had together .don't matter la ia yang bullshit atau baik baik .

kadang-kadang hati ini ibaratnya seperti pensil warna ,bila ia semakin pendek dan menghilang maka tidak akan pernah complete ia sebagai Luna 36 batang pensil berwarna dan berjaya menghasilkan satu lukisan yang realistik dan bukan yang busuk-busuk .mungkin you boleh kata "just forget about it ,and bukak buku baru" don't you ever know what does it take to write a book ;experience ,characters ,storyline ,crisis .if it the same old story ,why should i create a new one ?

difikirkan , i rasa hidup ini tidak fair ,kenapa perlu di penghujung cerita i yang kecundang ?kenapa i tidak pernah berjaya menjadi heroine dalam fairytale i sendiri ?why ?tapi dengan rasa tidak fair itu boleh diguna pakai untuk dapatkan yang fair ke ?tidak .

pernah satu masa dulu ,respon you ada lah satu kegilaan pada i .wujud satu perkataan rasanya mahu lompat ke langit .but now when i had one ,i feel like it was nothing ,it's empty .whatever your jokes is ,was my laugh , it was way back than .back in now ,it was just crap and rubbish .

i never attempt or try to build a wall between us but yourself forced me to do it .

remember this ,i never hate you but

i hate the lies people around you tell about
i hate the fact that you trust them
i hate when you accepting it with no doubt

too bad when ,
the day you decided to make it up back to me ,i decided to leave you for-forever

1 comment:

miss invee said...

Awww.. saba k.. sometimes people want to believe in something despite what their guts tells them to. They find comfort in it and they cast the truth away. or sometimes they maybe gullible enough to be blinded by the truth. It's not their fault really. It's just their nature of being who they are.huhu. So hang in there. Wishing tomorrow would be brighter.